Am i ugly? by Michelle Elman

I love love love this book. I wasn’t hooked by the cover of the book but when I read the blurb and looked up Michelle on Instagram @scarrednotscared (she seems super awesome) I was persuaded to read the book. I am glad I did.

It also has in the end pages suggestions of other body positive books, which I will be looking out for (there goes my TBR again)


I follow quite a few people now on Instagram that call out diet culture and whatnot and it really is revolutionary.

Like the numbers on your clothes labels, diets, counting calories, VBO, fat shaming? NONE OF THAT CONTRIBUTES TO WHO YOU ARE AS A PERSON. It is all a load of bollocks.

Yet we grow up believing this bollocks. It’s crazy how I used to think if I couldn’t fit into a size ten pair of jeans I thought I was fat and ugly. I would be miserable for days after. I even stopped silly dancing to crap pop music in my bedroom because I started to feel so self -conscious about the weight I was gaining a few years ago.

We’re a world obsessed with shrinking. WTF?


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Book Haul

I’m poor, I don’t usually buy books brand new and so it was a real treat buying a few in August and September.

August

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The Woman with an Owl Tattoo by Anne Walsh Donnelly.

This life-affirming poetry collection reflects on the author’s growth since the ending of her marriage and what it means to unearth one’s true sexual orientation, in mid-life. Anne Walsh Donnelly’s intimate exploration of sexuality and identity is both brave and touching, marking this debut collection as a triumph.

Will you Still Love me if I Love her by Elfie

A debut poetry chapbook exploring queer realisation, self-discovery, and search for acceptance. This sapphic collection features poems ‘Attraction’ and ‘Fraud’ first published by Royal Rose Magazine and ‘TV’ featured in Issue 3 of Constellate Literary Journal.

Lady Saturn by Wanda Deglane

Lady Saturn by contemporary poet Wanda Deglane is in itself a navigation through depression and anxiety to find love – the utmost important self-love. These personal poems traverse the backdrop of what it means to be born into chaos, to feel unwanted and unloved, to be constantly seeking and attempting self-discovery, to struggle to sleep with a racing mind or to defeat depression and anxiety with the help of a pill that makes her brain like her ‘mother’s old microwave, / constantly short-circuiting and casting the whole room / in darkness.’ Take this quest through beautiful, lyrical stanzas and vivid imagery depicting pain, trauma, depression, anxiety, and a deep yearning to land softly at a place on the verge of inner acceptance and love, just the way you are, seeking that happy-go-lucky soul you once inhabited.

September

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Potential by Isabelle Kenyon

Published as part of the much-loved Ghost City Press summer series, Isabelle Kenyon’s micro chapbook is a brave and prickly collection which touches on new relationships, the-thing-between-her-legs and sexual assault. Light in tone, it is an exploration of the wonderful and the horrible things which can occur alongside love.

the sea refuses no river by Bethany Rivers

In this collection, the sea refuses no river, there is an acceptance of the pain and an acceptance of the healing moments; the healing journeys. To quote Adrienne Rich: I came to explore the wreck’, and in this collection, Bethany discovers how, ‘The words are purposes. The words are maps.’

Nostalgia poem. Where i am at.

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the horizon, up ahead
another county, towns in which
many other opportunities
while my hair whips in the wind
skirt lifting from my legs
carrier bag plastic flapping in my clenched fist
i look up and across
that tantalising horizon
but even if
i took that journey
packed a bag &left
would i find home –
people who care
locals receiving. Helpful with accommodation
the work plentiful
details correct
yes
or will it be as it is now
effort, hard work
the very maximum for effect
never giving up, a determination –
i know
i don’t need to journey
i am going to celebrate where i am at

originally published put me down, I’m terrible

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